“If you think of this world as a place simply intended for our happiness,
you find it quite intolerable: think of it as a place for training and correction and it's not so bad.”
- C.S. Lewis
5.31.2013
5.30.2013
VANESSAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF US
She approached me. I hadn't seen her in years. We briefly caught up and shared stories. We spoke about kids and church and ended on things like evangelism. It was a momentary encounter with an ending that left me dumbfounded.
"There just aren't a lot of opportunities to share the gospel," she said. "Most of our friends are Christians and at baseball games and such there just isn't that much time. It seems we live in a bubble." Hmmm...I thought of my Muslim neighbor, the "Christian" friend who really just goes to church because it's the moral thing to do, the stranger at the store, my children.
We headed in the direction of our cars and sort of said goodbye as we were mutually approached by Vanessa. Vanessa carried a bucket filled with candy, Pixie sticks standing tall. She wore a shirt that matched her friends not so far off in the parking lot. I'd met these gals before. I'd shared words and time, a book and prayer. I'd prayed for the women in the ministry represented by Vanessa. These women live in a group home. They haven't had it easy. But since when has easy hurled someone headlong toward the feet of Christ? I'm certain that has much to do with why these women love Jesus, why these women need Jesus. They're refreshingly real and raw, their powerfully beautiful stories of redemption.
"I don't engage in open solicitation," the woman I'd been speaking with of evangelism literally seconds before announced abruptly as she hurriedly jumped in her car, church bumper sticker plastered on back. She drove away and that was that.
Well, OK then. That was odd, I thought. Here we were mere blinks before speaking of opportunities for evangelism, seemingly non-existent in "the bubble". It was an iconically ironic moment.
A bit frazzled by the dismissal, I entered into conversation with Vanessa. I'm always encouraged by the Vanessas. Something in my heart resonates with the Thelmas. I asked how the gal I'd met from their ministry years before was doing. Annabelle was her name. I've not forgotten her. I won't forget her. She's not well I'm sad to say, though the details of her story are hers. I pray for her right then and there knowing God has not forgotten her. He WILL NOT forget her! He is with her now...wherever she may be. (Please, please pray for Annabelle!)
I explain to Vanessa that I'm empty but prayerfully able to offer words from the Word through the Holy Spirit who speaks through emptiness to encourage to the fullest as only He can do. She gets it. Tears well. It's as if we're immediately yoked, we two vastly different women, who know intimately the same God.
I see the opportunity to evangelize, to strengthen a disciple. It's right in front of me if I choose. I see that she too can minister to me. And, what if I'd kept walking? What if I drove away?
We talk about her daughter and the beacon she will be for Jesus. I share about my own parents who only met Christ in their thirties, but gave legacy to the next generation (mine), which would bear the torch for another generation, and another, and another I pray. She sees it too. Her eyes gleam, forehead too. It's hot in the parking lot sun. But, Vanessa doesn't mind. She has purpose being there. She's not afraid to be ignored.
When our 20 minutes was done (complete with at least 5 hugs...I'm a hugger) and I drove home praying for those women by name, I had a hard time coming to grips with just how many opportunities we miss. If we would just be bold enough, if we would just slow down enough for the one, if we would just own truth so much that we can't ignore the urge to give it away, how usable we would be. How usable we can be!
I'm thinking about Vanessa. I'm thinking about opportunities right in front of us every day. I'm thinking about how dumped out people can be the voice of Jesus to hurting hearts if we would just make ourselves available, if we would resist the temptation to walk by. I'm thinking of how Vanessa's faith spoke to me, how much the one who drove away had missed.
I don't need Pixie sticks, but what Vanessa gave me in exchange for our encounter was so much more than what I gave her. I pray her heart was encouraged, but more, I'm grateful for the Jesus I saw in her eyes. I'm eager to seek out evangelistic opportunities unashamed. I'm on the lookout right here in the bubble. I'm begging God to redeem Annabelle once again, to draw the prodigal home! I'm asking Him to fill poured out me with boldness and encouragements for others straight from the heart of Him. I'm lifting up my sisters in Christ who've found faith, hope, and love through group home ministry and also for those of us who walk right by, drive away all too often when the Vanessas are right in front of us.
"Then [Jesus] said to his disciples, 'The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.'" Matthew 9:37-38
"For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes." Romans 1:16
"There just aren't a lot of opportunities to share the gospel," she said. "Most of our friends are Christians and at baseball games and such there just isn't that much time. It seems we live in a bubble." Hmmm...I thought of my Muslim neighbor, the "Christian" friend who really just goes to church because it's the moral thing to do, the stranger at the store, my children.
We headed in the direction of our cars and sort of said goodbye as we were mutually approached by Vanessa. Vanessa carried a bucket filled with candy, Pixie sticks standing tall. She wore a shirt that matched her friends not so far off in the parking lot. I'd met these gals before. I'd shared words and time, a book and prayer. I'd prayed for the women in the ministry represented by Vanessa. These women live in a group home. They haven't had it easy. But since when has easy hurled someone headlong toward the feet of Christ? I'm certain that has much to do with why these women love Jesus, why these women need Jesus. They're refreshingly real and raw, their powerfully beautiful stories of redemption.
"I don't engage in open solicitation," the woman I'd been speaking with of evangelism literally seconds before announced abruptly as she hurriedly jumped in her car, church bumper sticker plastered on back. She drove away and that was that.
Well, OK then. That was odd, I thought. Here we were mere blinks before speaking of opportunities for evangelism, seemingly non-existent in "the bubble". It was an iconically ironic moment.
A bit frazzled by the dismissal, I entered into conversation with Vanessa. I'm always encouraged by the Vanessas. Something in my heart resonates with the Thelmas. I asked how the gal I'd met from their ministry years before was doing. Annabelle was her name. I've not forgotten her. I won't forget her. She's not well I'm sad to say, though the details of her story are hers. I pray for her right then and there knowing God has not forgotten her. He WILL NOT forget her! He is with her now...wherever she may be. (Please, please pray for Annabelle!)
I explain to Vanessa that I'm empty but prayerfully able to offer words from the Word through the Holy Spirit who speaks through emptiness to encourage to the fullest as only He can do. She gets it. Tears well. It's as if we're immediately yoked, we two vastly different women, who know intimately the same God.
I see the opportunity to evangelize, to strengthen a disciple. It's right in front of me if I choose. I see that she too can minister to me. And, what if I'd kept walking? What if I drove away?
We talk about her daughter and the beacon she will be for Jesus. I share about my own parents who only met Christ in their thirties, but gave legacy to the next generation (mine), which would bear the torch for another generation, and another, and another I pray. She sees it too. Her eyes gleam, forehead too. It's hot in the parking lot sun. But, Vanessa doesn't mind. She has purpose being there. She's not afraid to be ignored.
When our 20 minutes was done (complete with at least 5 hugs...I'm a hugger) and I drove home praying for those women by name, I had a hard time coming to grips with just how many opportunities we miss. If we would just be bold enough, if we would just slow down enough for the one, if we would just own truth so much that we can't ignore the urge to give it away, how usable we would be. How usable we can be!
I'm thinking about Vanessa. I'm thinking about opportunities right in front of us every day. I'm thinking about how dumped out people can be the voice of Jesus to hurting hearts if we would just make ourselves available, if we would resist the temptation to walk by. I'm thinking of how Vanessa's faith spoke to me, how much the one who drove away had missed.
I don't need Pixie sticks, but what Vanessa gave me in exchange for our encounter was so much more than what I gave her. I pray her heart was encouraged, but more, I'm grateful for the Jesus I saw in her eyes. I'm eager to seek out evangelistic opportunities unashamed. I'm on the lookout right here in the bubble. I'm begging God to redeem Annabelle once again, to draw the prodigal home! I'm asking Him to fill poured out me with boldness and encouragements for others straight from the heart of Him. I'm lifting up my sisters in Christ who've found faith, hope, and love through group home ministry and also for those of us who walk right by, drive away all too often when the Vanessas are right in front of us.
"Then [Jesus] said to his disciples, 'The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.'" Matthew 9:37-38
"For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes." Romans 1:16
5.28.2013
THANKSGIVING
I read and ponder,
Pray and think.
I write, examine, see.
I ask the Lord to open eyes,
"Pave the way to Thee?"
Thanksgiving, He asks of me. "Even for the hard?" My feeble heart protests, then relents as I conclude, yes, even for the hard. I'm sure, especially for the hard. The gouge which tore open my quest to finding Him, I wasn't ready for it, or so I thought. But, He knew all the more.
And what of this thanksgiving? What's the mystery? To count it all JOY?! when my heart hurts and memories bite and surely the fears are justified. No. Surely, they are not...because Jesus has modeled for me thanksgiving, even for (especially for) the cup that He would drink. He has shown the better way...to give thanks and honor and glory and power back to the One it belongs.
He deems best. We submit. We follow. Pour all. Empty all. Receive ALL...with THANKSGIVING. He asks this of me.
The mug spills out as I write and think and ponder, pray. And, so be it. No metaphor could play out better. All spilled out across the table, through cracks, to floor and yet, THANKSGIVING...anyway. It spills out too from deep within this weathered heart of mine. "Whatever! Have it all your way, Lord! I'm in. The memories don't have to be erased," I decide. Rather, "Use them!" I cry. "For your glory and your perfect will, use them, Lord. I'm yours...thankfully yours." Anything else ends in defeat, victory for the foe, the opposite of salvation.
Whatever He gives, it is best. THANKSGIVING. Whatever He deems, ACCEPTANCE, but more than that, praise! So, use it, use it all, I ask and pray and surrender and give back and offer thankful acceptance overflowing with JOY at the thought of having been chosen to suffer for the greater good of thanksgiving.
Pray and think.
I write, examine, see.
I ask the Lord to open eyes,
"Pave the way to Thee?"
Thanksgiving, He asks of me. "Even for the hard?" My feeble heart protests, then relents as I conclude, yes, even for the hard. I'm sure, especially for the hard. The gouge which tore open my quest to finding Him, I wasn't ready for it, or so I thought. But, He knew all the more.
And what of this thanksgiving? What's the mystery? To count it all JOY?! when my heart hurts and memories bite and surely the fears are justified. No. Surely, they are not...because Jesus has modeled for me thanksgiving, even for (especially for) the cup that He would drink. He has shown the better way...to give thanks and honor and glory and power back to the One it belongs.
He deems best. We submit. We follow. Pour all. Empty all. Receive ALL...with THANKSGIVING. He asks this of me.
The mug spills out as I write and think and ponder, pray. And, so be it. No metaphor could play out better. All spilled out across the table, through cracks, to floor and yet, THANKSGIVING...anyway. It spills out too from deep within this weathered heart of mine. "Whatever! Have it all your way, Lord! I'm in. The memories don't have to be erased," I decide. Rather, "Use them!" I cry. "For your glory and your perfect will, use them, Lord. I'm yours...thankfully yours." Anything else ends in defeat, victory for the foe, the opposite of salvation.
Whatever He gives, it is best. THANKSGIVING. Whatever He deems, ACCEPTANCE, but more than that, praise! So, use it, use it all, I ask and pray and surrender and give back and offer thankful acceptance overflowing with JOY at the thought of having been chosen to suffer for the greater good of thanksgiving.
"The one who offers thanksgiving as his sacrifice glorifies me." Psalm 50:23
5.25.2013
JOHN 14:27
A dear friend sent me this when Noble was in the hospital.
It was just what I needed...a beautiful reminder. :)
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you.
Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."
John 14:27
5.22.2013
HOME
We are home!
It's been a journey these last couple of days. The doctors were able to identify the species of malaria Noble has
and treatment has begun. We're praying for a full recovery!
It's been a journey these last couple of days. The doctors were able to identify the species of malaria Noble has
and treatment has begun. We're praying for a full recovery!
From Noble's energy and smiles today, you wouldn't even know he's been so sick.
It's amazing to see him running around, laughing, being himself.
It makes a mama happy.
From here, we're just going to keep an eye on Noble's enlarged spleen (a side effect of the malaria). It occupies half of his abdomen! Poor guy. It should start to go down now that the malaria is being treated. We're praying for that. We're supposed to remain cautious for a while (as cautious as a three year old can be I suppose) as we don't want the spleen to rupture with any abrupt contact or falls. Let's just pray it goes down and down from here.
The medical care and the love and support we received during this trial were incredible! For every person who showed care for us, thank you so very much! God brought us great comfort through so many!!
We're reminded of the brevity of life, the preciousness of it. We're reminded to LOVE more each day. We're praising God for the healing process that's already begun for our Noble. And, we're thankful for God's love poured out to us all through the body of Christ these past few days. It's really good to be home.
"And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful."
Colossians 3:14-15
5.21.2013
MALARIA
It was a long day at the hospital...especially for Noble, but the love and care from so many kept our spirits up. Our sweet boy does in fact have a severe case of malaria. His fever peaked at 105.2 today. Poor little guy! He is in the pediatric ward for tonight, but based on the lab results, they may transfer him to ICU tomorrow. He has been such a little trooper and an ideal patient.
Noble is such a sweetheart.
The look on Noble's face was priceless when they wheeled his chicken tenders and french fries over to his bedside. It was as if he was asking with his eyes, "Are you sure this is all for me?" He was SO excited about his meal!
Noble is such a kind and tender little boy with excellent manners. It's easy to love and respect his beautiful heart. We're so thankful that God has blessed our family with such a special friend in Noble. We love him immensely!!
We will know more tomorrow...for tonight we rest and praise God for caring so lovingly for Noble and for us today.
Each day we have is a gift.
May we all cherish every hour God allows us health and life and may we use our time wisely and for His glory while we can.
"Let all that you do be done in love." 1 Corinthians 16:14
WHEN IT RAINS...
...it pours sometimes. That's sort of how we're feeling today. God remains on His throne, however. Nothing can come our way apart from His sovereign will. We believe it!
"The LORD has established his throne in the heavens,
and his kingdom rules over
all."
Psalm 103:19
Our precious boy, Noble, has had sudden high fevers off and on for three days now. When they come on, he is debilitated. When they pass, he is totally normal. It's been strange and awful for him. Similarly, our other little buddies from the DRC have experienced episodes like these and it has turned out to be malaria. We're wondering if this could also be the case for Noble.
Today he began vomitting and was in and out of awareness. Clearly, something is wrong. He is in the ER with his Daddy and two big sisters who wouldn't let him go without them. He is in Good Hands.
Before he left, he raised his arms to be held, a good sign. He reclined in my arms before going. I'm holding onto that moment right now as I wait for updates and pray. It's interesting to realize just how very much I love this child God blessed me with not so long ago. Noble is very special. He is mine and I'm his. Thank you, Lord, for Noble!
My heart cries out to God for healing for our son. My heart cries out to God for another dear friends' son who is sick with malaria in the DRC right now. Though Noble is in an advanced hospital teaming with the best medical care America has to offer, my heart rejoices for our little buddy in the DRC because I know that the only thing he (and Noble) really need is Jesus. If God chooses healing, then there will be healing, with or without medical care. It's as simple as that. HE is all we ever need.
So, I sit here (on my couch) and I wait for news from the ER and I pray. I lift up my boy, so small and frightened and I praise God that he has a family who loves Him. I thank God as well for our little friend in the Congo. We know that he too has a family who loves him and is praying for him just the same.
We're asking for miracles and healing, Lord. We've read that's what you do. We know that you can. We trust you with every ounce of faith we can muster. Will you?
Thank you for praying with us for our Noble. Please pray for our friend's little boy too.
We await God's perfect plans and trust Him entirely.
He is faithful.
"But the Lord is faithful. He will establish you and guard you against the evil one."
2 Thessalonians 3:3
TAILBONE TALES FROM THE COUCH
Well, here I sit...doing my very best to remain inactive. Ummm...that's IMPOSSIBLE.
But, at least less active I must be because unfortunately, I have injured my tailbone.
But, at least less active I must be because unfortunately, I have injured my tailbone.
If you want to feel really, really lame...then you can be like me and fall out of a hammock.
(It's OK...plenty of people who love me a lot have also laughed when I told them...not naming names here.)
I too still laugh (and cringe) every time I picture the scenario. Sadly, it hurts to laugh, so I suppress.
Anyhow, add some concrete under that broken down hammock and what we have is a serious situation of lameness.
(It's OK...plenty of people who love me a lot have also laughed when I told them...not naming names here.)
I too still laugh (and cringe) every time I picture the scenario. Sadly, it hurts to laugh, so I suppress.
Anyhow, add some concrete under that broken down hammock and what we have is a serious situation of lameness.
Duhhhh...
So, there I was, all geared up for the BIG relax when the thingy broke, my tailbone too, and what's left in the wake is a whole lot of couch sitting. SO not fun...and SO very impractical with eight little ones who need me. How in the world?!
However, if a silver lining is to be found, we've discovered ample opportunity to practice servantheartedness around here these last few days. I'm praying we all learn quickly what God is teaching us through this and that He, in His mercy, restores us to "normal" once again. Until then, I'll be couch-bound as much as is possible for someone like me, enjoying the extra snuggles and hugs, figuring out just how much I can accomplish from down. Pray for me??
The view from my couch lately :)
(For the record...she didn't spill it...she just cleaned it :))
"Be still and know that I am God."
Psalm 46:10
Psalm 46:10
5.20.2013
DRESS UP HISTORY
We're always looking for ways to make learning fun and interactive, conquering the stigma that "school" equals sitting at a desk all day hammering through textbooks and worksheets. Not that textbooks or worksheets are bad...we use them too, but if I were a kid (or the adult teaching my kids) I'd much rather learn (and teach) in creative ways.
Hence, dress up history. Our costume closet wardrobe is stocked with time period learning fun. The kids of all ages LOVE it!!
They always have...and I hope they always do!
We love historical fiction and we're always
reading as a primary method of learning. I'm constantly encouraging the kids to open
up our Big
Book of History (from Answers in Genesis) and see where their history
reading plugs into the BIG picture.
It's a great resource!
What a blessing to see siblings big and small
putting their learning into action, playing together on an ordinary school day,
traveling back in time, letting their imaginations lead the way, cooperating
with one another...
to name a few of the many reasons why we homeschool!
It's true that learning is always more
fun when you (literally) get into it! It warms my heart to listen to them play, it's a privilege to have them home, and I can't imagine a more interactive way to "dress up" learning good old fashioned history than what the kids are up to today...dress up history.
"Sing to him a new song; play skillfully,
and shout for joy."
Psalm 33:3
5.16.2013
A DECADE OF PREPARATION
It's been a long time coming...over a decade at least. God has stripped and pruned and groomed and refueled and we pray it's drawing near. We've longed for change, to use our lives, time, resources to serve Him with everything. We've prayed and waited and waited and prayed. Could the time be coming soon?
There've been confirmations, nudges and yet no definite plans in sight. What we do know is that God is moving in our hearts and prompting us to action. What we do know is He's given us specific desires to minister alongside one another (and as a family) according to His specific plans. What we do know is that He knows everything we don't. That's enough for us...for now.
And so we wait and pray some more and ask for God's direction. We search and serve right here, right now and seek opportunities to give more, opportunities to LOVE more...everyday we seek.
We cry out, "Lord, what can we do for you? Our hearts overflow with desire. How can we serve you more? We want to live our lives for you. How can we LOVE others more with your LOVE? We long for you to use us. Nothing matters more!"
It's been a decade of preparation. Some of it was painful. But, God has had a plan with eternal implications. A chapter has closed, the door's been shut, and we sense it is time to move on.
Cue reevaluation!
Our Father God knows just what He is doing and we trust Him more each day. Our hearts and arms are open wide, awaiting His appointment(s). What next, Lord?
It's pretty strange to sum up an entire decade in just one sentence, but it seems that's what God has done. He's taken the season and given it purpose, simple though the purpose be.
And now we say, "Use it, Lord! For your glory and according to your will, please put to use this decade of preparation."
"And I heard the voice of the Lord saying,
'Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?'
Then I said, 'Here I am! Send me.'"
Isaiah 6:8
5.15.2013
OVERNIGHTER: ELKA & DADDY
Yesterday, Elka and Brodie headed off on
their first overnight date!
They got to stay in our college alumni cottage which overlooks the ocean
and it has been a special time for them together.
They got to stay in our college alumni cottage which overlooks the ocean
and it has been a special time for them together.
We planned this date before Haiti
because we really wanted Elka to have her own experience
with her Daddy too before Aida and Brodie leave with him for their mission trip in June.
I hope that she feels LOVED, cherished, and poured into!
with her Daddy too before Aida and Brodie leave with him for their mission trip in June.
I hope that she feels LOVED, cherished, and poured into!
Although Elka wasn't old enough for this particular mission trip, she can hardly wait to
GO, serve, and love needy people around the world.
She is deeply compassionate and exuberantly passionate to GO and I can't wait to send her...soon!
GO, serve, and love needy people around the world.
She is deeply compassionate and exuberantly passionate to GO and I can't wait to send her...soon!
Elka has literally
counted down the days, hours, seconds until this special overnight getaway. We've missed them here at home, but it's been a privilege to send
them off. I hope that Elka feels as special as she is. I've prayed the Lord would meet them closely in their time away and fill them
with His presence on their Daddy/Daughter overnighter...I know He has and always will!
Thank you, Lord, for our Elka...our sensitive, enthusiastic, rainbow of a daughter.
She fills our lives with joy and color and we know you will use her life mightily for your glory!
She fills our lives with joy and color and we know you will use her life mightily for your glory!
I sure do LOVE this girl!!!
So, Daddy and Elka are headed home after a fun last day at the beach. It's amazing how many
memories these two have made in just a day and a half! I'm so glad they had such a great time!!
memories these two have made in just a day and a half! I'm so glad they had such a great time!!
"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:6
5.14.2013
HOW MANY KIDS...
...can fit in a five foot round plastic pool?
Apparently, at least eight...if it's hot enough. :)
"The summer is already near." Luke 21:30
5.13.2013
GO TO THE WORD
I dappled along a rabbit trail this morning seeking encouragement for my family.
I read and probed and clicked and watched and thought I was on a good trek...for a while.
I read and probed and clicked and watched and thought I was on a good trek...for a while.
In my quest for inspiration other than what the world hails, most of which is more harmful than good, I invested my best efforts to find something refreshing. However, what I discovered after perhaps an hour or so of digging was simply what I knew all along.
"Go to the Word."
It's like a beacon flashing in my eyes the same way the morning sun is beaming through the shutters beside me.
It's like a beacon flashing in my eyes the same way the morning sun is beaming through the shutters beside me.
"Go to the Word."
It's the only source that never fails.
It's the only source that never fails.
"Go to the Word."
God's Word, the Bible, His breath is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword. It corrects, rebukes, convicts, guides, instructs, and gently leads. It holds the answer to every quandary, the key to every door.
God's Word, the Bible, His breath is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword. It corrects, rebukes, convicts, guides, instructs, and gently leads. It holds the answer to every quandary, the key to every door.
"Go to the Word,"
I hear Him whisper and in faith I respond. I know that He is all I need. Why was I searching farther?
I hear Him whisper and in faith I respond. I know that He is all I need. Why was I searching farther?
"Go to the Word."
Books, philosophies, teachings from man, they all have potential to disappoint. They all will prove imperfect. But, God's Word is always perfect. It cannot be proved wrong. It is TRUTH and has the power to transform those who read it.
Books, philosophies, teachings from man, they all have potential to disappoint. They all will prove imperfect. But, God's Word is always perfect. It cannot be proved wrong. It is TRUTH and has the power to transform those who read it.
"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart."
Hebrews 4:12
Hebrews 4:12
So, I go to the Word and I let it infuse. I listen to my Teacher's voice. He's always teaching. I ask Him in prayerful retreat to help me teach my family. I know He will respond. I ask for conviction and the power of the Holy Spirit to be what He wants me to be...for them. I can show His LOVE. He's gifted us to one another. He can use me, I decide. So, I pour myself out, an empty vessel. He fills.
"With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments!
I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you."
Psalm 119:10-11
I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you."
Psalm 119:10-11
I go to the Word and look no further. Nothing could satisfy more. I go to the Word in quiet expectation, the only expectation reliant. I go to the Word knowing I'll be met with wisdom unending.
I remind myself with intentionality. I ask God to remind me once more and I go.
I thank Him for His whisper today and decide with confidence that His Word and His LOVE are what we really need.
Again and again and again and again I retreat. I go to the Word.
I thank Him for His whisper today and decide with confidence that His Word and His LOVE are what we really need.
Again and again and again and again I retreat. I go to the Word.
"Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path."
Psalm 119:105
"All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction,
and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work."
2 Timothy 3:16-17
5.09.2013
JESUS ACT STICK DATE: B & ME
I LOVE that my son and I have a tradition of going to Souplantation for yummy
food and awesome conversation time dates.
He regularly chooses this for his Jesus Act Stick Date with me and I hope he never stops!
He regularly chooses this for his Jesus Act Stick Date with me and I hope he never stops!
I LOVE that we
have "a table"...our table.
It's the booth near the ice cream. It seats just two. And, it's got our name on it every time.
It's the booth near the ice cream. It seats just two. And, it's got our name on it every time.
I'm sure one day I'll go
back to that table and cry my mommy eyes out when my little boy is all grown up.
I'm sure I'll remember with nostalia the look in his eyes as he sat across from
me and poured his little heart out over pizza, chocolate muffins, rootbeer or
sprite, and a plate of grapes with one broccoli (the latter two just to make his
mom happy). I'm sure one day when my boy has matured, I'll miss the way he used
to tap his feet and play drums on his knees while we talked about the meaning of life and Legos.
How I love my
son!
I hope we never stop visiting our table as long as he and I exist.
And well after that, I hope we've made a connection that lingers through
generations the way we lingered over seconds of swirl ice cream with chocolate
syrup and caramel all those dates at Souplantation.
"His mercy is for those who fear him from generation to generation."
Luke 1:50
"Tell your children of it, and let your children tell their children, and their
children to another generation."
Joel 1:3
5.07.2013
PEACE
"You're home is so...(he glances around)...peaceful," our social worker made us laugh!!! With eight bustling children, our home is often not exactly "peaceful" and yet truly I hope it would exude peace. God can produce that, even in the midst of seeming chaos. He is, after all, perfect peace and my prayer is that HE is what people sense when they spend time in our home, His peace over us.
"You're so calm," to which I share my heart honestly, "If you only knew how much goes on inside." It's like the duck on the pond...steadily gliding along glassy waters seemingly with ease, yet just under the water's surface webbed feet paddle and peddle and forge on with determination and purpose, mysteriously propelled from underneath. That's totally me...duck on the pond girl.
Peace. He gives us peace. If we were peaceful on our own, we'd have no need of a Savior underneath. That's why Jesus came!
In pondering the fruit of the Spirit this week and focusing on peace today, I've been mulling through the oxymoron of pure peace that comes from knowing Christ which transcends our rather unpeaceful circumstances at times. In other words, I'm contending with the variability of circumstantial peace and God's peace - two completely different entities, independent one from the other. But, God's peace which surpasses our understanding trumps all.
Everyone has a weak spot and our enemy plays the game. He'll poke where it counts and he's never ashamed to do so. Paradoxically, peace...or it's counterpart, fear, really...is my soft spot...don't let my calmness fool you (or me). That enemy, He pokes me there often and I know why.
I've noticed a common thread (that I've not been immune to according to God's ordination) in those who've experienced tragedy. Loss creates an immediate awareness of what we stand to lose, what our loved ones stand to lose and often this instigates an internal fight or flight coping mechanism called: fear. Unfortunately/fortunately (depending on how I process this thorn), this is true for me.
I was a teenager when my mom died of cancer. Her death was sudden, just two months following her diagnosis. It was devastating. I was wounded. And, scars remained on my young and already tender heart. But God had a loving plan for me.
In His wonderful, restorative grace and mercy, God has used that untimely, painful loss to shape my heart for Him, to cause me to need Him, to live these fleeting days on earth for Him and blatantly aware of the vapor that it is. God chose to catapult my adulthood journey toward Himself through origins of pain from my youth, which is really so like Him. He's used the "bad" for good. He always does and often does, and my perspective has been profoundly influenced...so has my need for peace.
Those scars on my heart I speak of, they've left painful memories that burden my peace at times. Etched memories leave a psyche with temptation to fear more pain, more loss. I must remind myself that this life is not our place of rest. We toil here these days we roam the earth as we await eternal Sabbath rest. We wait. And truly, if we can bring most glory to God through our strife, then so be it! If difficulty draws us into intimacy with the Savior, I accept it!
Until the final resting place, His peace...I seek it. I need it. I'm totally dependent upon it in my human frailty and peddling. I trust the Lord with all my heart, I do! AND, I need Him to establish peace. If ever I have peace, it's only because of the Lord. His peace is all I've got. ("All I have is Christ!") On my own I'm empty, empty, empty. I believe that's how He'd like us to be...emptied out, ready to be filled to the brim and overflowing with His Spirit, blindingly aware that HE is all we have! I believe that's why He granted me my thorn gift to bear.
Peace. He gives me peace. It's only from Him and He offers it. In my flesh I fail often, but in His peace I find rest. In my home I face challenges hourly, but in His peace my home rests. In my circumstances I encounter trials, but in Christ alone I place my trust and I find rest called perfect peace that only He can give! I find it.
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
"You're so calm," to which I share my heart honestly, "If you only knew how much goes on inside." It's like the duck on the pond...steadily gliding along glassy waters seemingly with ease, yet just under the water's surface webbed feet paddle and peddle and forge on with determination and purpose, mysteriously propelled from underneath. That's totally me...duck on the pond girl.
Peace. He gives us peace. If we were peaceful on our own, we'd have no need of a Savior underneath. That's why Jesus came!
"Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you.
Not as the world gives do I give to you.
Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid."
John 14:27
In pondering the fruit of the Spirit this week and focusing on peace today, I've been mulling through the oxymoron of pure peace that comes from knowing Christ which transcends our rather unpeaceful circumstances at times. In other words, I'm contending with the variability of circumstantial peace and God's peace - two completely different entities, independent one from the other. But, God's peace which surpasses our understanding trumps all.
"And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding,
will guard your hearts
and your minds in Christ Jesus."
Philippians 4:7
Everyone has a weak spot and our enemy plays the game. He'll poke where it counts and he's never ashamed to do so. Paradoxically, peace...or it's counterpart, fear, really...is my soft spot...don't let my calmness fool you (or me). That enemy, He pokes me there often and I know why.
I've noticed a common thread (that I've not been immune to according to God's ordination) in those who've experienced tragedy. Loss creates an immediate awareness of what we stand to lose, what our loved ones stand to lose and often this instigates an internal fight or flight coping mechanism called: fear. Unfortunately/fortunately (depending on how I process this thorn), this is true for me.
I was a teenager when my mom died of cancer. Her death was sudden, just two months following her diagnosis. It was devastating. I was wounded. And, scars remained on my young and already tender heart. But God had a loving plan for me.
In His wonderful, restorative grace and mercy, God has used that untimely, painful loss to shape my heart for Him, to cause me to need Him, to live these fleeting days on earth for Him and blatantly aware of the vapor that it is. God chose to catapult my adulthood journey toward Himself through origins of pain from my youth, which is really so like Him. He's used the "bad" for good. He always does and often does, and my perspective has been profoundly influenced...so has my need for peace.
Those scars on my heart I speak of, they've left painful memories that burden my peace at times. Etched memories leave a psyche with temptation to fear more pain, more loss. I must remind myself that this life is not our place of rest. We toil here these days we roam the earth as we await eternal Sabbath rest. We wait. And truly, if we can bring most glory to God through our strife, then so be it! If difficulty draws us into intimacy with the Savior, I accept it!
Until the final resting place, His peace...I seek it. I need it. I'm totally dependent upon it in my human frailty and peddling. I trust the Lord with all my heart, I do! AND, I need Him to establish peace. If ever I have peace, it's only because of the Lord. His peace is all I've got. ("All I have is Christ!") On my own I'm empty, empty, empty. I believe that's how He'd like us to be...emptied out, ready to be filled to the brim and overflowing with His Spirit, blindingly aware that HE is all we have! I believe that's why He granted me my thorn gift to bear.
Peace. He gives me peace. It's only from Him and He offers it. In my flesh I fail often, but in His peace I find rest. In my home I face challenges hourly, but in His peace my home rests. In my circumstances I encounter trials, but in Christ alone I place my trust and I find rest called perfect peace that only He can give! I find it.
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
"The fruit of the Spirit is...peace."
Galatians 5:22
"You keep him in perfect peace
whose mind is stayed on you,
because he trusts in you.
Trust in the Lord forever,
for the Lord God is an everlasting rock."
whose mind is stayed on you,
because he trusts in you.
Trust in the Lord forever,
for the Lord God is an everlasting rock."
Isaiah 26:3-4
Visiting my children's CD again today, I'm choosing peace and gaining courage to find it through encouraging music like this:
5.06.2013
GENTLENESS
I want to be like Jesus.
This morning I read one of my favorite moments of Jesus' response to His offenders just prior to His crucifixion. Being questioned by the high priest after His arrest, "one of the officers standing by struck Jesus with his hand" (John 18:22)...
...Jesus' response:
"If what I said is wrong, bear witness about the wrong; but if what I said is right, why do you strike me?"
John 18:23
So calm. Bound, persecuted, beaten, spat upon and ready to die...yet calm, dignified, innocent.
I want to be like Jesus.
It's not unusual for me to track through the fruit of the Spirit and ask myself which ones I need to pray about for myself as well as my family members. God is faithful to help us when we submit our lives to prayer and the fruit of His Spirit is something we will always need more of. So, once again, I've been focusing on these fruits, asking the Lord to help me each day to intentionally pray for His infusion in my life and in the lives of those I love and care for. Today I'm dwelling on gentleness.
"But let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.
1 Peter 3:4
"Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls."
Matthew 11:29
"He will tend his flock like a shepherd; he will gather the lambs in his arms; he
will carry them in his bosom, and gently lead those that are with young."
Isaiah 40:11
That's how I want to be...gentle like Jesus. It's interesting the dichotomy though. He may have been gentle, but no one was ever more bold. I'd like to be both like Jesus. I'd like to raise children who can be both just like Jesus. He can give us His gentleness and also boldness for His glory when we give ourselves to His doing.
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same
so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to
overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS,
GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
"The fruit of the Spirit is...gentleness."
Galatians 5:23
"But we proved to be gentle among you, as a nursing mother tenderly cares for her own children."
1 Thessalonians 2:7
Most of the great songs that glue Scripture in my head belong to my children's CDs. Gentle Like Jesus is one such example. I'm thinking this is a good one for high rotation Scripture sticking today:
5.05.2013
LOVE
Dwelling on the fruit of the Spirit, the book of John has been such an encouragement to me lately. One thing that particularly strikes me about the way John writes of love is that he is described as "the disciple whom Jesus loved" (John 13:23, 19:26, 20:2, 21:20).
It's got me thinking...to be LOVED teaches one how to know LOVE for themselves. Therefore, let us not only receive God's LOVE as we abide in Him, but also let us LOVE one another with His LOVE and see how it multiplies...and multiplies!!!
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinedresser. Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.
Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.
I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.
This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.
You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another." John 15:1-2, 4-5, 12-13, 16-17
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same
so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to
overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS,
GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
"The fruit of the Spirit is...LOVE."
Galatians 5:22
"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us."
1 John 4:7-12
Cross references:
5.04.2013
KINDNESS
The other day I found myself in a swarm of children (a typical scenario for sure), when someone stepped on my heel. I swung around with an irritated feeling inside, ready to reprimand the perpetrator, when I realized the child who'd stepped on my heel was not one of my own. It was a friend. Without a blink, I hugged the dear one and laughed it off. I really wasn't annoyed at all!
I caught myself and had to ask honestly why it was that I would be more frustrated if it had been one of my kids as opposed to one of our little friends??? What's the deal with my heart? And, the ironic thing as well is if you know me at all, then you know that I ADORE my children. Not only do I LOVE them, but I really, really LIKE them too. So why the annoyed reaction?
Well, this silly little moment has me thinking about kindness. How I treat my kids is how I'm treating Jesus. The Bible tells me so.
Jesus LOVES children...so do I. I'm reminded though, that sometimes it's those we love most who we find ourselves most comfortable with and therefore more relaxed in our reactions. At our recent marriage conference, the speaker pointed out that the opposite of love is not hate, but rather apathy. I think he was right.
LOVE requires intentionality to a certain degree and I'm bent on remaining intentional...no matter how comfortable I get with my loved ones, my roomates, my family. I realize fully that even when "no one" is looking, there is One who always is...and He's the One who matters most. He can fill us with the fruit of His Spirit. He can fill us with His kindness. He has an infinite supply.
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
Lord, you are faithful to help us in our weaknesses. We ask that you would pour out your Spirit and your abilities through us as empty, cracked vessels. May we shine a light that comes directly from you and give you glory because you are able.
I caught myself and had to ask honestly why it was that I would be more frustrated if it had been one of my kids as opposed to one of our little friends??? What's the deal with my heart? And, the ironic thing as well is if you know me at all, then you know that I ADORE my children. Not only do I LOVE them, but I really, really LIKE them too. So why the annoyed reaction?
Well, this silly little moment has me thinking about kindness. How I treat my kids is how I'm treating Jesus. The Bible tells me so.
"And the King will answer them,
‘Truly, I say to you,
as you did it to one of the
least of these
my brothers, you did it to me.'"
Matthew 25:40
Jesus LOVES children...so do I. I'm reminded though, that sometimes it's those we love most who we find ourselves most comfortable with and therefore more relaxed in our reactions. At our recent marriage conference, the speaker pointed out that the opposite of love is not hate, but rather apathy. I think he was right.
LOVE requires intentionality to a certain degree and I'm bent on remaining intentional...no matter how comfortable I get with my loved ones, my roomates, my family. I realize fully that even when "no one" is looking, there is One who always is...and He's the One who matters most. He can fill us with the fruit of His Spirit. He can fill us with His kindness. He has an infinite supply.
So, I pour myself out (again and again) and I encourage my family to do the same so that together and by the grace of God, we might abide in a home filled to overflowing with LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE, KINDNESS, GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, AND SELF-CONTROL. (Galatians 5:22-23)
Lord, you are faithful to help us in our weaknesses. We ask that you would pour out your Spirit and your abilities through us as empty, cracked vessels. May we shine a light that comes directly from you and give you glory because you are able.
"Love is...kind." 1 Corinthians 13:4
"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
"The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness."
Lamentations 3:22-23
5.02.2013
NOBLE'S BIBLE
Today, one of those moments we parents pray for happened. According to standard procedure, Mom and Dad set about our day with Bible reading, prayer, and a steaming mug alongside...and someone had been watching, taking it all in day after day.
Today, Noble asked for his first Bible. Fortunately, I make it a habit to pick up children's Bibles anytime I find one in new condition at the library book store or children's shop near our house, so I was excitedly prepared. I ran upstairs, found just the right one for Noble and inscribed his name in permanent ink.
Today, we witnessed first hand the power of modeled behavior. Our boy, so trusting and sweet, asked for a steaming mug too...his was warm milk. He sat by his father, read his Bible just like Dad, and learned without a word the importance of the Word.
Today, I (re)learned something too. I was reminded of the influence my relationship with Jesus has on my family, and not just my children, but upon my husband too.
"Wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct."
1 Peter 3:1-2
Today, my heart rejoiced over a son whose impressionable little soul saw something of value in his Bible. He knows that it is good and he's hungry for it. Praise the Lord! Welling up inside, I observed something extraordinary taking place in the ordinary right here in my kitchen. (How cherished to capture the moment!)
Today, and every day, we the parents have the opportunity to mold the clay of our children's young hearts, to press fingerprints of God's goodness, to stamp permanent markings on tablets of human hearts. We have the opportunity. Will we make the most of it?
"And you show that you are a letter from Christ
delivered by us, written not with
ink
but with the Spirit of the living God,
not on tablets of stone
but on
tablets of human hearts."
2 Corinthians 3:3
Today, our Noble...our kind, gentle, precious gift of a son...began the journey of a lifetime into the infinite pasture of reading God's Word. My heart's prayer is that he would hear the Good Shepherd's voice, that he would come to know his Savior, that God's grace would fall upon Noble and open the eyes of his heart.
So I pray, "Lord, please hear this mother's cry. Please beckon my son to your call that he might seek and find when he seeks you with his whole heart, that he might come to know the JOY that flows from knowing you! God, you can do that."
Nothing matters more.
"The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice. I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, just as the Father knows me and I know the Father; and I lay down my life for the sheep."
John 10:3, 4, 14, 15
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