We said goodbye 21 years ago today. That's 3 years longer than the time I had with her. It's odd to be on this side of the equation, to have lived my entire adult life without her, to so thoroughly enjoy this precious motherhood knowing hers was (seemingly) cut short.
"As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you."
Isaiah 66:13
Jesus took me in.
"For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in."
Psalm 27:10
After my father's death, the orphan-ness would at times smother me. I'd remind myself what he would have said in his time here,
when I'd look to him for comfort, "Turn to your heavenly Father." That's how he would direct me...if he were here.
"I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty."
2 Corinthians 6:18
My gaze is on the finish line, the one that they have passed. And this life feels fly-by-short on these days of nostalgic reflection,
this September feeling that comes over me every year. My parents both entered the gates of heaven singing triumphantly...in September. "Back to school", the smell of wet black top, newly sharpened pencils, fall, they all flood back a sorrow and praise jumbled mixture. Yes, it happens every year as I reflect and as I soak in how very much I'd like to hold their hands longer than she held mine.
this September feeling that comes over me every year. My parents both entered the gates of heaven singing triumphantly...in September. "Back to school", the smell of wet black top, newly sharpened pencils, fall, they all flood back a sorrow and praise jumbled mixture. Yes, it happens every year as I reflect and as I soak in how very much I'd like to hold their hands longer than she held mine.
Nevertheless, it is well...has been for a while now. It is well with my soul to remember and it comforts my heart to celebrate how
Jesus took me in. And, He takes His children in. The Shepherd, He never leaves or forsakes us and it's true He never will.
He will always hold our hands.
Jesus took me in. And, He takes His children in. The Shepherd, He never leaves or forsakes us and it's true He never will.
He will always hold our hands.
"For he has said, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.'"
Hebrews 13:5
We walked hand in hand through the courtyard, my little girl and I, singing Amazing Grace in harmony with the other tied in tight to my chest, and yet another asking to take photos. The knowing how few I have with my mom pushed away the temptation to reject the commemoration...something I suppose I ought to do more (let myself in on a photo every here and there...).
Hebrews 13:5
We walked hand in hand through the courtyard, my little girl and I, singing Amazing Grace in harmony with the other tied in tight to my chest, and yet another asking to take photos. The knowing how few I have with my mom pushed away the temptation to reject the commemoration...something I suppose I ought to do more (let myself in on a photo every here and there...).
'Cause they'll spread their wings soon enough.
They'll one day soar just like we all do.
But for now while they're pulled in close I pour my whole self out, dump my heart into theirs and prayerfully His heart into theirs. I press on forward toward forever with the Lord, my Savior, my Rock, the Way I make it through a day, testifying that He'll be the same for them that He's faithfully been for me. He will. I've lived this truth...live this truth...know it branded in. And it's a precious homecoming that lingers through my heart and soul today as I steep in this familiar September feeling.
"Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints."
Psalm 116:15
Psalm 116:15
