It was still dark when I tiptoed out of bed this morning, excited that we would have our first talks of the day...alone.
We share the silence, a quiet retreat before the bustling begins and I'm thankful. This time together means everything to me.
I love us.
It's as if our relationship grows deeper, stronger, more passionate as our years of unity increase. What a gift!
I long to be together, crave to be connected, require intimacy, and cling to this love like a lifeline. I need it.
Though such words could (and do) easily describe my emotion for my beloved husband just the same, the love I rejoice in today is for my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. This perfect love that satisfies and never disappoints is for my Father God. This communion so intimately yoked and trustworthy is with His Holy Spirit.
He impeccably reciprocates this love. He never fails with this love. He always exceeds my expectations with His love and I wonder, how could He?
"When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is man that you are mindful of him, and the son of man that you care for him?" Psalm 8:3-4
As I consider today why I long so eagerly to enjoy these first quiet moments of the day alone with the Lord, just us, a question I've pondered lately is answered.
Do I love Him?
How would I know?
Do I LOVE Him?
I'm not asking if I know about Him...facts, theology, head knowledge. I'm not asking if I go to church on Sundays. I'm not asking if I'm a good person. I'm asking, do I KNOW Him in the way you know someone you deeply LOVE? And, am I confident that He knows me? So I ask myself again...
Do I LOVE Him?
And, if I do, what does it feel like to really love someone?
What would I do if I intensely loved someone?
How much would I think about and talk about someone I genuinely love?
How motivated would I be to spend my time with someone I truly love?
How would I grieve if such a love were no longer mine?
I consider my feelings for Him. I revisit my inclinations for Him. I compare the way I talk about and think of Him with the other cherished relationships in my life...and I see it.
I LOVE Him.
I do.
"I love you, O LORD, my strength. The LORD is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." Psalm 18:1-2
"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you;
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands.
My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me."
Psalm 63:1-8
my soul thirsts for you;
my flesh faints for you,
as in a dry and weary land where there is no water.
So I have looked upon you in the sanctuary,
beholding your power and glory.
Because your steadfast love is better than life,
my lips will praise you.
So I will bless you as long as I live;
in your name I will lift up my hands.
My soul will be satisfied as with fat and rich food,
and my mouth will praise you with joyful lips,
when I remember you upon my bed,
and meditate on you in the watches of the night;
for you have been my help,
and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy.
My soul clings to you;
your right hand upholds me."
Psalm 63:1-8
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.
This is the great and first commandment." Matthew 22:37-38
